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hadyn4

Ivory and myself on my niece’s 4th birthday (around the time I felt the lump the first time)

I first noticed a small, hard, and round lump in my right breast about a year and a half ago, but I didn’t get it checked out for one reason: I didn’t have health insurance (I know what you’re thinking, and I think I’m an idiot too). As trivial as it may seem, to a 24 year old who is living paycheck to paycheck, it’s a huge deal and quite frankly, I didn’t think it was anything to be worried about. I told myself I would keep an eye on it and if it started to grow or hurt, I would suck it up and go see a doctor.

However, being 24 years old, I quickly forgot about it and kept on living my life.

About 6 months later, I noticed it again and decided to talk to my mom about it. She said it most likely wasn’t anything, but that I should get it looked at. The next week, after many annoying texts from my mom, I begrudgingly set up an appointment at Planned Parenthood.

I met with a very nice doctor and told her that I had felt a lump, but she immediately said something along the lines of, “Oh, you’re so young, I’m sure it’s nothing.” While checking me out, she told me that it felt like I had a cyst and that I shouldn’t be worried. Still she gave me a referral for an ultrasound just in case.

My bad again, because I lost that referral almost as soon as she gave it to me. My fiancé, Ivory, got frustrated with me and said that I should call and ask for another one, but I told him that the doctor sincerely sounded like she didn’t think it was a big deal, and therefore I didn’t think it was a big deal.

Big mistake.

I can almost guarantee that if I would’ve gone to get the ultrasound at this point, it would’ve come back either benign or at a very early stage and with a little surgery, I could have had it removed, and life could go on. But, of course not. All I could keep thinking about was if I needed to have surgery, I would no way of paying for it and I would be left with thousands of dollars in debt. So, I concluded that it wasn’t worth it.

I told myself I’d keep monitoring it…

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